The One with the Free Phone

Due to my hectic offshore schedule it became apparent that I would miss the few gigs that my favourite band had reformed to play. Geographically everything in Europe is close but logistically trying to organise everything is a massive hassle. That being said this was possibly my last chance to see Faith No More play.

The Cousin had picked the French festival "Rock en Seine" as the easiest for us to get to and the most likely for me to attend. We caught the Eurostar over mid-afternoon and decided to commence our boozing. We went to a few bars that we new to get into the Parisian spirit. Many bars were visited and a large quantity was consumed.

We ended up at a very French Brasserie that provided quite a feast (and even more wine). By the time we finished up it was well into the late evening so we metroed it back to the arrondissement we were staying in. It was rather late and we found a pretty dodgy bar devoted to 'the clash' to have a few pints in before it closed.

As we were walking back to the hotel we passed a stylish, Indian restaurant looking, cocktail bar that seemed to be pumping. We ventured inside for a night cap. The cousin headed to the bar and I sat at a comfy couch nearby. After the last couple were served the barman looked at my cousin and proceeded to tell him they were closed. This puzzled us for many reasons and I could see a verbal altercation in the mix. As I got up and moved to the bar I noticed something on the floor beside it. I bent down picked it up and returned my hands to my pocket. Grabbing the cousin we moved onto the street as he questioned my motive. As we walked down the street I produced a brand new iPhone from my pocket. Funnily enough it was locked and in French so I had no way to find it's owner. Even funnier is how easily the phones can be 'jailbroken' to be used by anyone. As such I now have a brand new iPhone.

The festival the next day turned out to be amazing which is solely contributed to a grand FNM performance and a free iPhone.

Thy One from Thee Globe

The Shakespeare's Globe has been around in old London town in its various forms for more years then I care to find out. A group of us went along for his most famous of tragedy - Romeo & Juliet.

We decided to get the £5 standing tickets to really experience the peasant life - which realistically would be my status back then. It was clear we were in the povo section when a woman fainted after standing there for too long. She was dragged to the side as the show carried on.

As the show got into it I noticed the lads playing the characters of Romeo and Tybalt were black. This was not in the least unusual, and they were were both rather good in the role (particularly Romeo), until the parents of Romeo came on stage with their skin as white as a ghost. Later on Juliet's description of him "Either my eyesight fails or thou look'st pale" pushed it a little further towards the edge. It took me to the end of the play, whether unintentionally or not, who did all the killing. Tybalt Kills Mercutio, Romeo kills Tybalt before killing himself. Three of the four deaths are the result of a black man.

I will leave you with my favourite quote: "Or I will drag thee on a hurdle thither. Out, you green-sickness carrion! out, you bag- gage! You tallow face!"

The One with the Upgrade

The Girl and I decided to take advantage of cheap Eurostar tickets to fulfill one of my European goals - spend a whole weekend eating/drinking only waffles, mussels and beer. It was also a good opportunity to check out a few statues of children and dogs urinating. For the uneducated - these goals can all be achieved in Brussels...

We met at St Pancreas demolished some sushi and wine in fairly quick fashion before heading for our train. As we approached our carriage the attendent turned us back revealing that there was no airconditioning here and we would be directed elsewhere into the business class seats. As we approached there was a small queue and it was clear they were struggling to find everybody seats.

As we got to the front of the line a rude couple pushed in front of us which was pretty amusing to me although they copped a rough serve from the girl. I pulled her aside to explain they would not exactly leave us behind - although her point was she didn't want to miss out on the business class upgrade. After they had seated everone else the train manager spoke to a few of his colleagues and it was apparent we would not be in this carriage.

"Follow me," he explained, "I have a special carriage for you." He then escorted us to a private room at the front of the carriage - with two large chairs and a couch. We reclined back into our chairs and left the door open. Quite a few people walked past and jealously looked in and it became even better after we opened our bottle of champagne.

Eventually the rude couple walked past, pausing in disbelief, with their jaws ajar before I reached over and with a smug smile slid the door closed. We could hear the woman berating the man as they wandered off down the corridor to the echoes of our laughter.