Monday 30 June 2008

The one with the £625 glass of Whiskey…

Well my Saturday started off pretty much the same as usual – with a nasty hangover and some morning rugby. This one was different however because instead of drinking throughout the afternoon we decided to take it easy in anticipation of the evening. I can tell you now what a smart option that turned out to be.

The girl and I went to meet Penfold and Boss Hog who were visiting from Sydney at a bar near Victoria Station. We were there for a while and had a number of drinks before moving on to another bar. Penfold’s brother decided to lead us not far to a rather exclusive and ritzy bar called Boisdale.

We walked up to the door and had to knock on the window only to be greeted by a large gruff looking man who I assumed ate small puppies for snacks. Penfold’s brother is pushing 5ft so I figured it would be a rather amusing story if he had of said the wrong thing. He asked if the manager was working and I found out later that he works at a similar one in central (and actually used to be his boss while working at this particular club).

Once the manager appeared to let us in we were led down past a 3 piece jazz band who were playing some lively tunes. It didn’t occur to me until later that they were actually facing the wall while they played (whether for show and effect I wasn’t so sure).

Finding our table we were seated to have a look around at the various stuffed animals, old guns and tidbits lining the walls. The best description I can give of this place is a cross between a 1930’s style gun club with an old prohibition gangster bar. Probably the coolest thing was an AK-47 across a boars head over the bar.

We had a couple of bottles of particularly expensive Champagne (yes the real stuff) before the boys decided to move onto the whiskey. I don’t think I have ever seen a list quite like it – the list of whiskeys was 22 pages long and had some interesting selections.

Upon scanning the list I found that for a measly 625 squid you can get “The Macallan 1946, 56 year old.” Check out the range here: http://www.boisdale.co.uk/pdfs/belgravia/wisky08.pdf. Unfortunately nobody decided to give that one ago so I don’t have any feedback. Penfold’s brother and friend decided to have “The Macallan Vintage 1974, 30 year old” that was exceptional. It had a slight smokey flavour and although the price tag was a little exorbitant (to say the least), I think is probably one of the finest alcohols I will ever taste.

It was when Penfold’s brother headed to the boys room that I had a devious idea. We called the manager over to grab us a glass of the cheapest (and hence worse tasting) whiskey and swapped out the glass with his 30 year old vintage. Being a manger of one of these bars should mean he has a keen nose (probably taste as well) for the finer types. The funny thing was on his return to the table he didn’t immediately clue in to the stitch up. After a couple of sips and a bit of nose turning from others who sampled he compared it to the good stuff in his friends glass. To his disgust he realised that something was a miss and clued in to the culprits after we rolled around howling with laughter.

Just after the prank my sophisticated side (read drunk side) decided that I needed to up the stakes and move onto my martini. Alas it wasn’t on the menu which gave me the opportunity to slip into my best British accent “a dry martini in a deep champagne glass, three measures of Gordon's gin, one of vodka, half a measure of Kina Lillet vermouth shaken not stirred [long pause for effect] Shake it very well until it's ice-cold, then add a large thin slice of lemon-peel.” Ahhh the Vesper – a drink oozing of class and respect. Unfortunately none of the traits made me look any better in my tatty t-shirt and yellow sneakers (mind you I was still oozing of quality swagger which the ladies clearly noticed).

By the time we left there was a substantial amount of the rich and snobby fellow patrons rolling around in a drunken state. It is good to see that the “social elite” (in their minds anyway) have the ability to get blotto with the rest of us. I am now saving my pennies for a return trip, to find out what a £625 glass of whiskey will taste like…

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