The one with all the dinners....

The Girl and I were at the parentals consuming a vast amount of booze. The bro and sis in law were there too and it wasn't long before the baby shots were brought out. Unfortunately for me there is a classic of myself wearing nothing but a pair of cowboy boots and shirt. All I can say is it must have been damn cold that day! (Note: by popular request if my parentals scan and send me the photo it will be put up on this site - I just hope they have stopped reading this thing....)

Moving forward after the photo show we found my old diary from the trip my parents took me on when I was a wee tike. This trip was 2 months around Seppo homeland and the UK. I remember large portions of it when reading back through but I was quite surprised the quality of detail in my early years.

It was quite amusing to read through the matter of fact description of what happened - probably a quality far removed from my current writing style of comedy and embellishment. The brutal honesty and descriptive sentences were certainly hilarious however only to be outdone by my sign-off on the majority of entries:
"and then we had some dinner and then we went to bed."

The One with the Awesome Kebab

The thing about living away from your home country is missing the subtle things. Sure you can pretty much get vegemite everywhere and Selfridges now stocks Kraft Mac and Cheese (my mouth waters everytime I say it), and even the Australian shop in Cov Garden has a vast range of things you never new you missed until you see it on the shelves.

One of the many things I didn't realise I was missing in London (until a very long Saturday drinking session) was a late night Kebab. Alas it wasn't until the last night of my visit back to the motherland that I managed to end an epic boozing day with a hearty feast. And what a feast - I think I added every ingredient and sauce that I had ever sampled on a kebab. Then the final act of my grand feasting accomplishment was to be laced in the hottest curry sauce they could offer.

The thing that makes the Aussie Kebab so much better than any attempt by a British Kebab is the range. If you think it will taste good on a Kebab an Aussie place will most likely have it. When you ask for a Kebab in London they quite literally make you a kebab without asking what toppings you want except for maybe the choice of 2 sauces. When you start saying what else you want on it they look at you with a grimace and keep doing it there way.

UPDATE: I have now found myself a fairly good kebab shop in South Wimbles - not quite a big range yet (although he is taking my advice and trying to add more) but he likes to sort out exactly what I want.

The One from the Hulk's Wedding!

The Girl and I were back in Aus for one of her good friend's wedding. I best explain the title before we go any further. When we are out on the sauce, she likes to do a very convincing impersonation of the Hulk. Not a likeness in the looks department but a rather severe Hulk roar to anyone passing unexpectedly by. It is hilarious to see it in action.

After the ceremony, in between a few photo ops, I took the opportunity to ask the bride for a Hulk. In sporting fashion she brought her arms up in a flexing of guns motion and gave out an almighty "Roooooooaaaaaaarrrrrr!" The Hulk in a wedding dress - that was possibly the highlight of the whole night. But alas it continued on with lots of booze, funny speeches, crazy dancing and a rendition of the Kings of Leons "Sex is on Fire" played out on a Ukulele.

The Jerked One

From now on I am Jerking everything! Anything that needs to be cooked is now going to be jerked first.

The One with the Attempted Bribe

At lunchtime on Tuesday I nipped out and invested in a nice blender that I required for margarita's and my jerked sauce, (before the jokes fly I will let you know how both of these turn out later).

Leaving work I was surprised to see quite a few Police vehicles outside. They usually have a few come down to send youth's through metal dectectors to search for knives. They have one or two vans but this day there were at least four that I could see.

Rounding the last van that I noticed had "dog squad" plastered on the side I saw a policewoman closing the rear doors. Being in a friendly mood I asked the lady if I could pat the dog. She turned back to me and quipped, "Why would I want to let you do that?" Not wanting to be put in my place, I jokingly replied "Oh come on I will give you this blender!"

The woman looked at me briefly and then turned and opened the door. To my disappointment the van was empty. She turned back to me and asked "Are you trying to bribe me?"

I gave a quick shake of the head and made a beeline for the station. I wasn't really sure if she was joking with me but I hadn't wanted to find out.